1. all those pretty lights  (3:31)  (kessell) copyright © 2002, fiendish musical thingys
 2. sneezin's greetings (live) (3:23)  (kessell) copyright © 2001, fiendish musical thingys
 3. gonna wrap my heart in ribbons  (3:56)  (thompson, hatchcock, and allard)
     copyright © hank thompson music
 4. the inevitable descent/dissent  (4:33)  (kessell)
     copyright © 2000, fiendish musical thingys
 5. please don't...?  (3:26)  (kessell) copyright © 2003, fiendish musical thingys
 6. it's all too much  (4:33)  (george harrison) copyright © 1969, emi records, ltd.

 7-17. funfair for the drowning man lo-fi live preview  (kessell)
         all songs copyright © 2003, fiendish musical thingys
 18. sneezin's greetings (congested version) (3:01)  (kessell)
          copyright © 2001, fiendish musical thingys

tracks 1, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 18 hastily recorded at the southside sandbox, 11/02 & 10/03.  all sounds by g.k.
track 2 recorded live 11/23/02 - mandolin - gary sudin
tracks 7-17 recorded live 08/30/03 - mandolin & slide guitar - gary sudin
design by g.k.  photos by anonymous. (thanks to john for finding them!)
big thanks to andy driscoll for letting me borrow his 4-track to finish this project.

"holidazed" copyright © 2003, fiendish musical thingys.
unauthorized duplication or sale is unlawful and very naughty.
violators subject to a switch and a lump of coal.


all those pretty lights
geoff kessell - november 2002

So now October is over
and Jack-o-lanterns, bruised and blackened
melt in the cold night air.
It’s thanks and remembering that November brings,
and soon there’ll be strings of colored bulbs everywhere.

But all those pretty lights will never hang just right,
if they’re knotted and tangled, twisted and strangled,
they’ll never shine as bright
as a single star on a clear and silent night.

It’s December’s burden to make us feel certain
that we’ll open the curtain on a shiny new year.
So we cheat the shadows with electric halos
to light the long nights and try to hide our fears.

But all those pretty lights...

‘Cos all the world’s electricity
won’t make them shine evenly
unless every single bulb is tended.
And one little spark
from a torn and tattered part
can bring the whole thing to a fiery ending.

Seven lifetimes of oil won’t keep those tiny lights loyal
if someone decides to pull out the plug.
And the brightest manger won’t keep you from the danger
of falling on your ass when someone pulls out the rug.

‘Cos all those pretty lights...

sneezin's greetings
geoff kessell - december 2001

You can tell by the colder winter weather
it's the time of year loved ones love to get together,
sharing kisses and sharing hugs,
and all manner of contagious bugs.
We'll be swapping holiday gifts
and giving each other pecks on the lips.
All that exchanging spit
is bound to make you sick.

So sneezin's greetings to you.
Hayfever's over, now it's time for flu,
head colds, strep, and bronchitis too.
Sneezin's greetings to you.

It warms the heart to see the joy
on faces of all little girls and boys,
faces with crystal-crusted noses
or ones that are running like garden hoses.
This year you don't want to seem rude
so you’ll have a piece of Aunt Tillie's devil's food,
even though you know Aunt Tillie's been sick
non-stop since 1976.

So sneezin's greetings everybody.
Time to start feeling stuffed up and snotty.
I'll toast you with an Alka-Setzer Flu hot toddy.
Sneezin's greetings everybody.

At Halloween it's creeps with razor blades,
July 4th it's fireworks that blow up like grenades,
but this is the most dangerous time of the year
'cos it’s our friends and relations we have to fear.
And opening cards isn't safe anymore
'cos there's always the chance they contain spores.
If you wanna give me a holiday gift,
why don’t you cross me off your Christmas list?

Sneezin's greetings to all.
Break out the Vicks, Ludens, and Halls.
It's time for everyone to sound like Lou Rawls.
Sneezin's greetings to all.
Sneezin's greetings everybody…
Sneezin's greetings to you…

the inevitable descent/dissent
geoff kessell - december 2000

I wanted to write something hopeful
about the human race
but I realized I couldn't do it and keep a straight face.
I wanted to be cheerful and warm everyone's inner fire
but I realized I'm not that good of a liar.

So fasten your seatbelts, this is the final descent.
The last chances have all gone, the good faith has been spent.
It's every man for himself for the remainder of this trip.
This world is going down, it’ll soon be time to jump this ship.
Say goodbye to your loved ones and friends,
it's time to begin the inevitable descent/dissent.

You may be looking forward to some kind of happy new year.
Me, I’m expecting the same old disbelief and fear.
You may think your smiles will keep us all afloat.
I hate to be the one to tell you but we’ve run out of lifeboats.

So fasten your seatbelts... This empire's going down...

Call me a cynic; you can call me negative.
I freely admit it, it's the way that I live.
You can call me a downer, you can call me a drag
but while you're up there cheering
I’m down here waving a white flag.

So fasten your seatbelts... This planet's going down...

Should auld mistakes be forgot
and lessons all unlearned,
some say was the fate of the dinosaurs,
now it’s our species’ turn.

please don’t...?
geoff kessell - october 2003

Looks like we’ll make it through another year.
I wasn’t sure we would
with all the lunacy that’s going on.
Things have gotten so surreal;
it hasn’t looked too good.
I sorta thought by now we could be gone.
Since we’re still here I thought I’d write another song
about all of us crazy human beings.
It seems like I’ve been beating this horse for so long
knowing it won’t change anything.

Still, all I ask is
please don’t blow us up today?
I know we don’t all see things the same way
but that’s not bad or wrong.
I know this is just a song,
but please don’t blow us up today?

This time last year we were holding our breath,
trying not to suffocate
from all the poison thoughts in the air.
Even then we could not expect
some of the wrong turns we’d make
on our reckless journey to nowhere.
Even though we’ve managed not to crash and burn,
that doesn’t mean the coast is clear.
As long as we continue not to learn,
 we’ll make the same mistakes year after year.

Still, all I ask is...

All this year I’ve looked for a sign
that things are getting better,
or at least not getting worse.
I  wish that I could find
something good behind all the
deception and threatening words.
Cos even though I believe
we’re all partly at fault
for the terrible mess this world is in,
I don’t want to see it all come to a halt
'cos we’re playing a game no one can ever win.

So all I ask is... and so on...

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